Things I’m Afraid to Tell You

Three years ago, Jess Lively bravely started the topic “Things I’m Afraid to Tell You” that hit the blogosphere, and then nearly a hundred other bloggers followed.  I followed the trend two years ago and decided to write about the topic again.

I’ve wanted to write about this for weeks already, however, I’m quite worried about this radical vulnerability, and considered it as a trap. At first, I’m not telling everyone my shit. I’ve been delving into a lot of feelings and thoughts winnowing which ones are “all right” to ration with the communal. I used to write in a very outspoken manner grasping how blogging is right now, and how the general public can cyber bully you. Exposing the naked truth about me is scary because you may laugh at me, or you may judge me. But upon getting lost reading a lot of bloggers sharing everything from their uncertainties to idiosyncratic secrets to anxieties and everything in between, I have to say, it was pretty affecting and inspirational.

Now it’s my turn to tell you. Please be gentle with me.

  1. There are a lot of changes in the office. Our division will be separating to the whole organization, and we’ll be totally an individual entity by September 2016. We are expecting a new company name, new organizational chart, new management, and new policies. There might be changes in salaries, leaves credits, and what-not. The even worst side, there were employees who had to leave since their contract ended, some were released, and the recent, my boss was advised to leave the organization. I don’t have any idea why he needed to leave. Isn’t that worrisome? What could happen next? We asked, but no definite answers were given. Like something is being covered.
  2. I’m still undecided on what to do with my life. I know I have a job, and everything seems well, but there’s something lacking. Prolly, it’s because I haven’t set my life goals yet, and whenever I’m thinking about it, I can’t seem to find what to set.
  3. Dating seems difficult now. I decided to date from time to time. Yes, I do regular dates like going to the movie, having fancy dinner, and the like. But I can’t feel happiness from dating anymore. So what more when I’ll be in a relationship, a commitment. This might be an outcome of my failed relationships.

I’m owning mine because I want you to own yours – you weirdness, your failings, your quirks.